WHS 65 Photo Downloads

WHS '65 Rules The Universe !!

Here are the Downloads for the Pictures I took at The Class of 65 50th Reunion.

Reunion download has most of them labeled with names in them for the class members' original last (Maiden) names.

Original has just the original photos and a few of the Golf Course and outside the Chahinkapa Zoo.

Technical Crap
MAKE SURE you have 2 Gigabytes available on your hard drive to hold the download and the extracted photos.
680 + 485 = 1.2 GB, times 2.

Download for Original 630 MB takes about 7 minutes on Verizon
Download for Reunion 485 MB takes about 5 minutes.
Charter or Comcast, get a cup of coffee while you wait.

The files are weakly encrypted via WinZip.
The Password is what we screamed at sporting events !
8 letters     all lowercase     3 words

No spaces.  go figure it out.

Original  Click HERE
If that doesn't work, try this
https://www.dropbox.com/s/r9ms7m3alpdwz5i/Originals.zip?dl=0

Reunion (names modified )  Click HERE 
If that doesn't work, try this 
https://www.dropbox.com/s/zwxfx4vxu9sbbpp/Reunion.zip?dl=0

Email Chuck if you can't guess the password. 
Chuck Peterka

Don't have WinZip ?
Download this free Zip/Unzip program and install it. 
For Windows users...
http://www.peazip.org/ 

For Mac users... go to google and search.

Anyway, Open the files one at a time, and just enter the password.
After extract you will then get a File Folder, and inside it are the pictures.

Enjoy,
Chuck

GENERATOR INFO

Generator info in my life.

Generac GP7500E 7500 Watt Portable Generator, Electric Start
got mine for $999.00 delivered.

I got a generator before SuperStorm Sandy hit us in the Philly area, and I LOVE IT !
The stuff to get is:
1. Make sure it's ELECTRIC START!  
  Like a snowblower, it's a heart attack trying to start it when it's cold and you keep having to pull and pull on the cord.
2. Get one at least 5000 Watts... Mine is 7500 and only cost $1000, got it from a firm in Tennessee
and they did FREE shipping right to my door.
===================
http://www.electricgeneratorsdirect.com
===================
3. Mine has a set of wheels, so it's like a wheelborrow and can be rolled in and out of the garage.
see http://www.generac.com/Portables/gpseries/gp7500E/
The E on the name is for ELECTRIC START!

You can probably get them at Home Depot, etc, and have a friend with a couple of 2X12's and a pickup truck to get it home.
This runs the Furnace, and the A/C in the summer.

Then (Here's the fun part ) had an electrician install a secondary panel with 10 breakers that has a bunch of circuit breakers with THREE Way toggles.

Circuit Breaker positions:
1. (top) Generator position
2. (middle)OFF Position
3. (bottom)  Main Utility Line Position
That process cost me $2000, but it was cheaper than a $6000 autostart whole house system.
I fire up the generator outside someplace safe, so the carbon monoxide doesn't get into the house.

Plug in this 15 foot heavy duty 4-Pronged plug, one end in the generator, one end in the plug in the garage that leads down to the panel in the basement.
Then go down in the basement and flip the switches from the Main Line to the Generator Line one at a time.
Wow, lots of stuff powered up.
Make sure the electrician includes the Washer, ( Dryer if it's Gas), dishwasher, garbage disposal, Furnace, Air Conditioner
For the 4 day outage last winter, we found this was critical.
End of story
===
Website on three options to hook it up.
1 is Dangerous,
1 is risky,
and 1 is super safe by having an electrician install a separate panel as I did.
http://m.instructables.com/id/Easy-Generator-to-Home-Hook-Up/?ALLSTEPS

Mr Rogers Neighborhood

6 excellent things about Mr Rogers

1. He basically saved public television.
In 1969 the government wanted to cut public television funds. Mister Rogers then went to Washington where he gave an amazing merely six minute speech. By the end of the speech not only did he charm the hostile Senators, he got them to double the budget they would have initially cut down. The whole thing can be found on youtube, a video called “Mister Rogers defending PBS to the US Senate.”

2. “Certain fundamentalist preachers hated him because, apparently not getting the “kindest man who ever lived” memo, they would ask him to denounce homosexuals.
Mr. Rogers’s response? He’d pat the target on the shoulder and say, “God loves you just as you are.” Rogers even belonged to a “More Light” congregation in Pittsburgh, a part of the Presbyterian Church dedicated to welcoming LGBT persons to full participation in the church.”

3. According to a TV Guide piece on him, Fred Rogers drove a plain old Impala for years.
One day, however, the car was stolen from the street near the TV station. When Rogers filed a police report, the story was picked up by every newspaper, radio and media outlet around town. Amazingly, within 48 hours the car was left in the exact spot where it was taken from, with an apology on the dashboard. It read, “If we’d known it was yours, we never would have taken it.”

4. Once, on a fancy trip up to a PBS exec’s house, he heard the limo driver was going to wait outside for 2 hours, so he insisted the driver come in and join them (which flustered the host).
 On the way back, Rogers sat up front, and when he learned that they were passing the driver’s home on the way, he asked if they could stop in to meet his family. According to the driver, it was one of the best nights of his life—the house supposedly lit up when Rogers arrived, and he played jazz piano and bantered with them late into the night. Further, like with the reporters, Rogers sent him notes and kept in touch with the driver for the rest of his life.

5. Most people have heard of Koko, the Stanford-educated gorilla who could speak about 1000 words in American Sign Language, and understand about 2000 in English.
What most people don’t know, however, is that Koko was an avid Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood fan. As Esquire reported, when Fred Rogers took a trip out to meet Koko for his show, not only did she immediately wrap her arms around him and embrace him, she did what she’d always seen him do onscreen: she proceeded to take his shoes off!

6. Once while rushing to a New York meeting, there were no cabs available, so Rogers and one of his colleagues hopped on the subway.
Esquire reported that the car was filled with people, and they assumed they wouldn’t be noticed. But when the crowd spotted Rogers, they all simultaneously burst into song, chanting "It’s a beautiful day in the neighborhood." The result made Rogers smile wide.

Real Heros

Got this from the ROWF folks, who got it from the "Hells Angels" magazine.

An Unexpected History Lesson
by Jason Seay

T/Sgt Samuel A. Rowlett, 359th BS Radio Operator, with Jason Seay, visits a B-17 for the first time since bailing out over Merseburg on 24 August 1944.

On April 2nd I decided to surprise my Pastor, former T/Sgt Samuel Rowlett who served as a radioman in the 359th squadron of the 303rd Bomb Group (heavy), with a trip to visit the Collings Foundation's B17. "Nine O Nine" was on display at Meacham Airport in Ft.Worth. I brought along Rev. Rowlett's son Danny, and my 8 year old son Sammie Joe, who is named for Rev. Rowlett. I thought this would be a great history lesson for my son .
Little did I know it was me that was in for a "History Lesson" that I would never forget!

When we arrived, Rev. Rowlett headed straight for the ladder at the front of the plane and was inside before I even realized he was gone! (He's 89 !). As soon as he was inside, he crawled in the top turret position and was standing at the twin 50cal. Rowlett looked down at me and said, "This is where I was on my first mission, there was a German plane coming at us, and I locked down on the triggers. I got him, but I burned up both barrels!, They didn't tell me to fire in short bursts, boy I thought I was going to be in big trouble when we got back for burning up those barrels!." I said, "Wait a minute. You just said that it was your first mission and you didn't know to fire in short bursts?!" Rowlett said, "some things you learned as you did it." I said, "You have German pilots shooting at you, Lord knows how high in the air you were, and you are worried about getting in trouble for burning up a machine gun?" Rowlett said, "oh they didn't like it when you tore stuff up."

Rev. Rowlett took off past the bomb bay towards the radioman's station. As this was my first time on a B17, I had no idea what to do or where to go! This 89 year old veteran looks through the bomb bay at me and said, "well come on." The bomb bay was open and I cautiously squeezed my way through to the radioman's area. Rev. Rowlett was in the seat busy turning knobs on the radio. I told him that the bomb bay was kind of scary he said, "you should have been back here on a mission!" He said that sometimes Eldridge (pilot) would call back and say, "Red (Rowlett's nickname) we got one hung up go kick it loose would ya. So I would go into the bay and kick 'er loose."

I hear my eight year old son, who is standing beside me say "COOL." I thought he's telling me this like it was nothing! I'm looking at the bomb bay with these inert bombs hanging there but they are marked TNT and I'm thinking..... "oh sure no big deal." I would have wet my pants!

Then he looks out the window and says "this is where I was sitting on that day (24, August 1944) over Merseburg when I looked out the window and saw that the left wing was on fire. I called up to Eldridge and said hey we've got a wing on fire. Eldridge said that's a tank fire! prepare to bail!."

I said, "Where did you go to bail out?" Rev. Rowlett said, "Well first I had to find my chute"

I thought find your chute! On that day you are participating in the largest bombing mission of WWII, against one of the toughest targets in Germany and you didn't have a parachute on! I would have had two of those things strapped on! So I asked, "Where was your chute?" Rowlett answered, "Oh it was laying back here on the floor, it was just a belly chute, that's all I brought with me that day."

At this point I realized why he broke his leg when he hit the ground after he bailed, and I had to ask, "Pastor were you crazy?"
 Rowlett replied, "No I was 19!"

Rowlett said, "I headed for the waist door", then took off toward the back of the plane, slipping past the ball turret like it wasn't even there! I'm trying to find something to hang onto as I carefully check my footing moving past the ball turret, and hear my son say, "Hurry up Dad, he's gonna show us how he bailed out!" I say silently "Oh Lord help me make it through this!"

At the waist door Rowlett said "When I got here one of the waist gunners was trying to get the door open, but it wouldn't budge. I told him to get out of my way so I could get out, he said No, I'm getting out first, I told him well you better hurry up cause I want out of here! I told him to put all of his weight against the door and I would push on him and that's what finally got it open. I went out of the plane head first, opened my belly chute and as soon as I was clear the plane exploded!. But we all got out!"

Rowlett exited the plane down the ladder facing forward as he did the day he bailed out.

I slowly clambered out of the plane, and once on the ground Rowlett said, "boy, that was the loneliest feeling I ever had watching those planes fade away flying home, and I was hanging there headed for the Germans. . . .Man, that was a lifetime ago."

I realized I had just been given a History Lesson that I would never forget. Over the years I had heard my father and other WWII Air Corps veterans tell stories. But being in that B17 reliving an event with someone who went through what Rev. Rowllet had, gave me a totally new perspective.

Standing on the tarmac I listened as other people viewed the plane, they would say "I thought these planes were bigger on the inside.", "This metal is not that thick.", " This is all they had for instruments and radios?", "There's no insulation in this thing, they must have been freezing.", " I don't see how they did it".

I looked at my son intently listening to a few old veterans reminiscing around a B17, I thought the same thing.
 I don't know how they did it. . . . but Thank God they did.

Skip forward

Wow, how time flies... it's now late March, another Birthday has moved past, and looking at the light at the end of the tunnel.

From J J Cohen who's down under...

When an old man died in the geriatric ward of a nursing home in an Australian country town, it was believed that he had nothing left of any value.
Later, when the nurses were going through his meagre possessions, They found this poem. Its quality and content so impressed the staff that copies were made and distributed to every nurse in the hospital.

One nurse took her copy to Melbourne. The old man's sole bequest to posterity has since appeared in the Christmas editions of magazines around the country and appearing in mags for Mental Health. A slide presentation has also been made based on his simple, but eloquent, poem.

And this old man, with nothing left to give to the world, is now the author of this 'anonymous' poem winging across the Internet.

Cranky Old Man

What do you see nurses? . . .. . .What do you see?
What are you thinking .. . when you're looking at me?
A cranky old man, . . . . . .not very wise,
Uncertain of habit .. . . . . . . .. with faraway eyes?
Who dribbles his food .. . ... . . and makes no reply.
When you say in a loud voice . .'I do wish you'd try!'
Who seems not to notice . . .the things that you do.
And forever is losing . . . . . .. . . A sock or shoe?
Who, resisting or not . . . ... lets you do as you will,
With bathing and feeding . . . .The long day to fill?
Is that what you're thinking?. .Is that what you see?
Then open your eyes, nurse .you're not looking at me.
I'll tell you who I am . . . . .. As I sit here so still,
As I do at your bidding, .. . . . as I eat at your will.
I'm a small child of Ten . .with a father and mother,
Brothers and sisters .. . . .. . who love one another
A young boy of Sixteen . . . .. with wings on his feet
Dreaming that soon now . . .. . . a lover he'll meet.
A groom soon at Twenty . . . ..my heart gives a leap.
Remembering, the vows .. .. .that I promised to keep.
At Twenty-Five, now . . . . .I have young of my own.
Who need me to guide . . . And a secure happy home.
A man of Thirty . .. . . . . My young now grown fast,
Bound to each other . . .. With ties that should last.
At Forty, my young sons .. .have grown and are gone,
But my woman is beside me . . to see I don't mourn.
At Fifty, once more, .. ...Babies play 'round my knee,
Again, we know children . . . . My loved one and me.
Dark days are upon me . . . . My wife is now dead.
I look at the future ... . . . . I shudder with dread.
For my young are all rearing .. . . young of their own.
And I think of the years . . . And the love that I've known.
I'm now an old man . . . . . . .. and nature is cruel.
It's jest to make old age . . . . . . . look like a fool.
The body, it crumbles .. .. . grace and vigour, depart.
There is now a stone . . . where I once had a heart.
But inside this old carcass . A young man still dwells,
And now and again . . . . . my battered heart swells
I remember the joys . . . . .. . I remember the pain.
And I'm loving and living . . . . . . . life over again.
I think of the years, all too few . . .. gone too fast.
And accept the stark fact . . . that nothing can last.
So open your eyes, people .. . . . .. . . open and see.
Not a cranky old man .
Look closer . . . . see .. .. . .. .... . ME!!

Remember this poem when you next meet an older person who you might brush aside without looking at the young soul within. We will all, one day, be there, too! And if you liked this post , PLEASE LIKE THIS PAGE and continue to be inspired with sayings that lift us and jokes to laugh at. Much love to you all, 
J.J. Cohen
===
Addendum:

RE-POST FROM LAST WEEK ---- Hey gang!! There have been many different stories we've heard since "THE CRANKY OLD MAN" POEM was last posted. First, it was by a woman in Scotland, named Phyllis McCormack, A nurse named Kate, originally a man from texas, etc. To be honest we are not sure exactly who wrote it and when at this point. This is about the 4th time though that we have re-posted that photo with the poem in the last year or so, as that is how we found it to begin with and J.J. was extremely touched by it, as were so many people, which we are so happy about. J.J. has stated a few times now that it didn't matter if it was man or woman or if it was written 60 years ago or 60 seconds ago, he originally re-posted it because of the sentiment behind the poem, not the story behind it being written. As a writer, he is sensitive to the needs of writers being credited appropriately, however, so he wanted me to post about it. Hopefully it ends here. We've had some very respectful mentions of where the post may have come from, which we totally appreciate and have gained some fans because of honest conversations...and then there have been some...well, not so respectful...We have read numerous accusations and J.J. has been called a myriad of names (but I won't tell you his favorite. With J.J.'s permission, I am only trying to insert some levity and humor in an awkward situation.) I hope this answers anyone's questions, in case you had any, as it was never our intent to exploit or manipulate in any way. We totally understand if you feel you need to leave the page as sometimes people come and go in our lives and it is what it is. All we ask is that before you go, perhaps look at the whole page, the jokes, the insight and the inspiration. If it's not your cup of tea, we hate to see you go but understand. In closing, we wish you all the best of holidays...Warmth, David, one of the better looking admins for the page ;)

 

Mer and Abbey

From 2006: According to Snopes

Some of you may know that our 14 year old dog, Abbey, died last month (8/23). The day after she died, my 4 year old daughter Meredith was crying and talking about how much she missed Abbey. She asked if we could write a letter to God so that when Abbey got to heaven, God would recognize her.

She dictated and I wrote:

    Dear God,

    Will you please take special care of our dog, Abbey? She died yesterday and is in heaven. We miss her very much. We are happy that you let us have her as our dog even though she got sick. I hope that you will play with her. She likes to play with balls and swim before she got sick. I am sending some pictures of her so that when you see her in heaven you will know she is our special dog. But I really do miss her.

    Love,

    Meredith Claire

    P.S.: Mommy wrote the words after Mer told them to her.

We put that in an envelope with 2 pictures of Abbey, and addressed it to God/Heaven. We put our return address on it. Then Mer stuck some stamps on the front (because, as she said, it may take lots of stamps to get a letter all the way to heaven) and that afternoon I let her drop it into the letter box at the post office.

For a few days, she would ask if God had gotten the letter yet. I told her that I thought He had. Yesterday, for Labor Day, we took the kids to Austin to a natural history museum. When we got back, there was a package wrapped in gold paper on our front porch. Curious, I went to look at it. It had a gold star card on the front and said "To: Mer" in an unfamiliar hand.

Meredith took it in and opened it. Inside was a book by Mr. Rogers, When a Pet Dies. Taped to the inside front cover was the letter we had written to God, in its opened envelope (which was marked 'Return to Sender: Insufficient address'). On the opposite page, one of the pictures of Abbey was taped under the words "For Meredith." We turned to the back cover, and there was the other picture of Abbey, and this handwritten note on pink paper:

    Dear Mer,

    I know that you will be happy to know that Abbey arrived safely and soundly in Heaven! Having the pictures you sent to me was such a big help. I recognized Abbey right away.

    You know, Meredith, she isn't sick anymore. Her spirit is here with me — just like she stays in your heart — young and running and playing. Abbey loved being your dog, you know. Since we don't need our bodies in heaven, I don't have any pockets! — so I can't keep your beautiful letter. I am sending it to you with the pictures so that you will have this book to keep and remember Abbey.

    One of my angels is taking care of this for me. I hope the little book helps.

    Thank you for the beautiful letter. Thank your mother for sending it. What a wonderful mother you have! I picked her especially for you.

    I send my blessings every day and remember that I love you very much. By the way, I am in heaven and wherever there is love.

    Love,

    God, and the special angel who wrote this after God told her the words.

As a parent and a pet lover, this is one of the kindest things that I've ever experienced. I have no way to know who sent it, but there is some very kind soul working in the dead letter office. Just wanted to share this act of compassion :) dear friend — hope you enjoy it as much as I did

Snopes says - Origins:   Since October 2006, this story has come to us under a variety of titles, including "Going Postal," "Angels at the Post Office," "Angels Turn Up In Unexpected Places," and "This is a US Postal Service Story."

According to Cary Clack of the San Antonio Express-News, the tale is real. In mid-August 2006, the San Antonio family of Greg and Joy Scrivener and their three children suffered the loss of Abbey, their 14-year-old black and white dog. Driven by concern for their pet's future welfare, 4-year-old Meredith, the Scriveners' middle child, dictated the note quoted above to her mother, then enclosed it and two photos of the family dog in an envelope addressed "To: God in Heaven." This envelope, bearing the family's return address, was dropped into a mailbox at the Brook Hollow post office.

Two weeks later, the Scriveners found on their front porch a package wrapped in gold-colored paper and addressed "To: Mer." In the parcel, along with the letter from "God" quoted above, was a book by Fred Rogers (of TV's Mr. Rogers' Neighborhood fame), When a Pet Dies (a book that "helps children share feelings of the loss of a pet while offering reassurance that grieving is a natural, healing thing to do").

According to her mother, Meredith was comforted by the book and letter and was unastounded that God saw fit to write back. "She wasn't surprised because she had such faith that her letter was going to get to God." (The oldest of the Scrivener children, 6-year-old Andy, was impressed, though: He "thought it was pretty special his sister got a book from the angel," says his mum.)

While Mrs. Scrivener considered asking at the post office about the package, she decided against it. "I kind of like not knowing," she said. "I don't know who took the time to do it, but it was an angel. We all think about doing these things, but no one takes the time to do it."

However, even true tales become subject to embellishment when circulated on the Internet. Often accompanying the online version is a photograph of a little blonde girl hugging a black Labrador retriever, yet it is not a photo of the actual child and dog from the story. Instead, some unknown person in search of a "little girl and her dog" picture copied it from a web site belonging to an unrelated family. The child in the misattributed photo's actual name is Isabelle and the dog's name is Sara.

Apollo Moon Walkers!!

The Apollo space program stretched from 1961 to 1972, culminating in a dozen men walking on the moon in its final years. The Moonwalkers were, in order:

- Neil Armstrong, Apollo 11, 1969  ( First Man on the Moon)

- Edwin "Buzz" Aldrin, Apollo 11, 1969  ( Second Man on the Moon)

- Charles "Pete" Conrad, Apollo 12, 1969

- Alan L. Bean, Apollo 12, 1969

- Alan Shepard, Apollo 14, 1971  ( First person to hit a Golf Ball on the Moon)

- Edgar D. Mitchell, Apollo 14, 1971

- David Scott, Apollo 15, 1971

- James B. Irwin, Apollo 15, 1971

- John Young, Apollo 16, 1972

- Charles M. Duke Jr., Apollo 16, 1972

- Harrison "Jack" Schmitt, Apollo 17, 1972

- Eugene A. Cernan, Apollo 17, 1972  ( LAST Man to walk on the Moon )

Read more here:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Apollo_program

Disturbed? Click Here

FIREWORKS!!!

Remember the Fireworks at LYA on Saturday after the 4th of July.
If that doesn't make sense, don't worry.

LIFE - The Screensaver

My Kind Of Teacher

For Grip in SD

A former Gunny Sergeant , having served his time with the Marine Corps, took a new job as a school teacher, but just before the school year started he injured his back when he fell from a cliff while rock climbing. As part of his therapy he was required to wear a fiberglass cast around the upper part of his body.

Fortunately, the cast fit under his shirt and wasn't that noticeable. On the first day of class, he found himself assigned to the toughest students in the school.

The smart-alec punks, having already heard the new teacher was a former Marine, were leery of him and decided to see how tough he really was, before trying any pranks.

Walking confidently into the rowdy classroom, the new teacher opened the window wide and sat down at his desk.
When a strong breeze made his tie flap, he picked up a stapler, opened it up flat, and 'Bam, Bam, Bam!'  promptly stapled the tie to his chest. 

Dead silence ... He had no trouble with discipline that year. 

 

Love the Kids...

Why do you love your kids?
1. For what they've done.
2. For what they're doing.
3. For what they're going to do.


Be VERY Proud of your kids... they deserve it!
Oh, and TELL THEM, OFTEN!


Oh, and this works for Grand Kids, too!

YUMMY!!!!

Cinnamon Cashew Roasted Nuts
[ I also prefer Walnuts, or Pecans , others prefer Almonds ]

1 egg white
1 tablespoon water
1/2 t. almond extract  [ Optional}

4 c. almonds , walnut, cashews or pecans
  [ Raw, UNSALTED ]

1/2c. Splenda or if you are die-hard organic, use Sugar!
1/4 t. salt   [ Optional]
 2 or 3 Tablespoons. Cinnamon

Whisk 1st three liquid ingredients together, and pour over nuts,
Stir to coat very well. 

Stir last three ingredients together, and then Sprinkle over nuts and stir again really well.

Bake on parchment paper-lined or lightly sprayed baking sheet with edges. 
[ I skip the paper or light spray... they don't stick much, and scraping with a spatula every 20 minutes is sufficient.]

250 degrees F for 1 hr.
Take out every 20 minutes, stir them up with a spatula to keep them from clumping togher,
and then put ‘em back in oven.

Cool. Store in zip lock bags or in tight jar.
23 nuts Equal 1 point Weight Watchers,
but I doubt if you can stop at 23.
REALLY YUMMY!!

Update on my apology... from the past, by another 'Dad'

Tomgram:
Chip Ward, Apologies to the Next Generation for the Turmoil to Come
Posted by Chip Ward at 9:25am, March 27, 2012.

We Screwed Up
A Letter of Apology to My Granddaughter
By Chip Ward
[Note: I became politically active and committed on the day 20 years ago when I realized I could stand on the front porch of my house and point to three homes where children were in wheelchairs, to a home where a child had just died of leukemia, to another where a child was born missing a kidney, and yet another where a child suffered from spina bifida.  All my parental alarms went off at once and I asked the obvious question: What’s going on here?  Did I inadvertently move my three children into harm’s way when we settled in this high desert valley in Utah?  A quest to find answers in Utah’s nuclear history and then seek solutions followed.  Politics for me was never motivated by ideology.  It was always about parenting.
Today my three kids are, thankfully, healthy adults.  But now that grandchildren are being added to our family, my blood runs cold whenever I project out 50 years and imagine what their world will be like at middle age -- assuming they get that far and that there is still a recognizable “world” to be part of.  I wrote the following letter to my granddaughter, Madeline, who is almost four years old.  Although she cannot read it today, I hope she will read it in a future that proves so much better than the one that is probable, and so terribly unfair.  I’m sharing this letter with other parents and grandparents in the hope that it may move them to embrace their roles as citizens and commit to the hard work of making the planet viable, the economy equitable, and our culture democratic for the many Madelines to come.]
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
March 20, 2012
Dear Maddie,
        I address this letter to you, but please share it with Jack, Tasiah, and other grandchildren who are yet unborn.  Also, with your children and theirs.  My unconditional love for my children and grandchildren convinces me that, if I could live long enough to embrace my great-grandchildren, I would love them as deeply as I love you.
On behalf of my generation of grandparents to all of you, I want to apologize.
I am sorry we used up all the oil.  It took a million years for those layers of carbon goo to form under the Earth’s crust and we used up most of it in a geological instant.  No doubt there will be some left and perhaps you can get around the fact that what remains is already distant, dirty, and dangerous, but the low-hanging fruit will be long-gone by the time you are my age.  We took it all.

There’s no excuse, really.  We are gas-hogs, plain and simple.  We got hooked on faster-bigger-more and charged right over the carrying capacity of the planet.  Oil made it possible.
Machines are our slaves and coal, oil, and gas are their food.  They helped us grow so much of our own food that we could overpopulate the Earth.  We could ship stuff and travel all over the globe, and still have enough fuel left to drive home alone in trucks in time to watch Monday Night Football.

Rocket fuel, fertilizer, baby bottles, lawn chairs: we made everything and anything out of oil and could never get enough of it.  We could have conserved more for you to use in your lifetime.  Instead, we demonstrated the self-restraint of crack addicts. It’s been great having all that oil to play with and we built our entire world around that.  Living without it will be tough.  Sorry.
I hope we develop clean, renewable energy sources soon, or that you and your generation figure out how to do that quickly.  In the meantime, sorry about the climate.  We just didn’t realize our addiction to carbon would come with monster storms, epic droughts, Biblical floods, wildfire infernos, rising seas, migration, starvation, pestilence, civil war, failed states, police states, and resource wars.

I’m sure Henry Ford didn’t see that coming when he figured out how to mass-produce automobiles and sell them to Everyman.  I know my parents didn’t see the downside of using so much gas and coal.  The all-electric house and a car in the driveway was their American Dream.  For my generation, owning a car became a birthright.  Today, it would be hard for most of us to live without a car.  I have no idea what you’ll do to get around or how you will heat your home.  Oops!

We also pigged out on most of the fertile soil, the forests and their timber, and the oceans that teemed with fish before we scraped the seabed raw, dumped our poisonous wastes in the water, and turned it acid and barren.  Hey, that ocean was an awesome place and it’s too bad you can’t know it like we did.  There were bright coral reefs, vibrant runs of red salmon, ribbons of birds embroidering the shores, graceful shells, the solace and majesty of the wild sea…
…But then I never saw the vast herds of bison that roamed the American heartland, so I know it is hard to miss something you only saw in pictures.  We took lots of photos.

We thought we were pretty smart because we walked a man on the moon.  Our technology is indeed amazing.  I was raised without computers, smart phones, and the World Wide Web, so I appreciate how our engineering prowess has enhanced our lives, but I also know it has a downside.

When I was a kid we worried that the Cold War would go nuclear.  And it wasn’t until a river caught fire near Cleveland that we realized fouling your own nest isn’t so smart after all.  Well, you know about the rest -- the coal-fired power plants, acid rain, the hole in the ozone...

There were plenty of signs we took a wrong turn but we kept on going.  Dumb, stubborn, blind: Who knows why we couldn’t stop?  Greed maybe -- powerful corporations we couldn’t overcome. It won’t matter much to you who is to blame.  You’ll be too busy coping in the diminished world we bequeath you.

One set of problems we pass on to you is not altogether our fault.  It was handed down to us by our parents’ generation so hammered by cataclysmic world wars and economic hardship that they armed themselves to the teeth and saw enemies everywhere.  Their paranoia was understandable, but they passed their fears on to us and we should have seen through them. 

I have lived through four major American wars in my 62 years, and by now defense and homeland security are powerful industries with a stranglehold on Congress and the economy.  We knew that was a lousy deal, but trauma and terror darkened our imaginations and distorted our priorities.  And, like you, we needed jobs.

Sorry we spent your inheritance on all that cheap bling and, especially, all those weapons of mass destruction.  That was crazy and wasteful.   I can’t explain it.  I guess we’ve been confused for a long time now.

Oh, and sorry about the confusion.  We called it advertising and it seemed like it would be easy enough to control.  When I was a kid, commercials merely interrupted entertainment.  Don’t know when the lines all blurred and the buy, buy, buy message became so ubiquitous and all-consuming.  It just got outta hand and we couldn’t stop it, even when we realized we hated it and that it was taking us over.  We turned away from one another, tuned in, and got lost.
I’m betting you can still download this note, copy it, share it, bust it up and remake it, and that you do so while plugged into some sort of electrical device you can’t live without -- so maybe you don’t think that an apology for technology is needed and, if that’s the case, an apology is especially relevant. 

The tools we gave you are fine, but the apps are mostly bogus.  We made an industry of silly distraction.  When our spirits hungered, we fed them clay that filled but did not nourish them.  If you still don’t know the difference, blame us because we started it.

And sorry about the chemicals.  I mean the ones you were born with in your blood and bones that stay there -- even though we don’t know what they’ll do to you).  Who thought that the fire retardant that kept smokers from igniting their pillows and children’s clothes from bursting into flames would end up in umbilical cords and infants?

It just seemed like better living through chemistry at the time.  Same with all the other chemicals you carry.  We learned to accept cancer and I guess you will, too.  I’m sure there will be better treatments for that in your lifetime than we have today.  If you can afford them, that is.  Turning healthcare over to predatory corporations was another bad move.

All in all, our chemical obsession was pretty reckless and we got into that same old pattern: just couldn’t give up all the neat stuff.  Oh, we tried.  We took the lead out of gasoline and banned DDT, but mostly we did too little, too late.  I hope you’ve done better.  Maybe it will help your generation to run out of oil, since so many of the toxic chemicals came from that.  Anyway, we didn’t see it coming and we could have, should have. Our bad.

There are so many other things I wish I could change for you.  We leave behind a noisy world.  Silence is rare today, and unless some future catastrophe has left your numbers greatly diminished, your machines stilled, and your streets ghostly empty, it is likely that the last remnants of tranquility will be gone by the time you are my age.

And how about all those species, the abundant and wondrous creatures that are fading away forever as I write these words?  I never saw a polar bear and I guess you can live without that, too, but when I think of the peep and chirp of frogs at night, the hum of bees busy on a flower bed, the trill of birds at dawn, and so many other splendorous pleasures that you may no longer have, I ache with regret.  We should have done more to keep the planet whole and well, but we couldn’t get clear of the old ways of seeing, the ingrained habits, the way we hobble one another’s choices so that the best intentions never get realized.

Mostly I’m sorry about taking all the good water.  When I was a child I could kneel down and drink from a brook or spring wherever we camped and played.  We could still hike up to glaciers and ski down snow-capped mountains.

Clean, crisp, cold, fresh water is life’s most precious taste.  A life-giving gift, all water is holy.  I repeat: holy.  We treated it, instead, as if it were merely useful.  We wasted and tainted it and, again in a geological moment, sucked up aquifers that had taken 10,000 years to gather below ground.  In my lifetime, glaciers are melting away, wells are running dry, dust storms are blowing, and rivers like the mighty Colorado are running dry before they reach the sea.  I hate to think of what will be left for you.  Sorry.  So very, very sorry.

I’m sure there’s a boatload of other trouble we’re leaving you that I haven’t covered here.  My purpose is not to offer a complete catalog of our follies and atrocities, but to do what we taught your parents to do when they were as little as you are today.

When you make a mistake, we told them, admit it, and then do better.  If you do something wrong, own up and say you are sorry.  After that, you can work on making amends.
I am trying to see a way out of the hardship and turmoil we are making for you.  As I work to stop the madness, I will be mindful of how much harder your struggles will be as you deal with the challenges we leave you to face.

The best I can do to help you through the overheated future we are making is to love you now.  I cannot change the past and my struggle to make a healthier future for you is uncertain, but today I can teach you, encourage you, and help you be as strong and smart and confident as you can be, so that whatever the future holds, whatever crises you face, you are as ready as possible. We will learn to laugh together, too, because love and laughter can pull you through the toughest times.

I know a better world is possible. We create that better world by reaching out to one another, listening, learning, and speaking from our hearts, face to face, neighbor to neighbor, one community after another, openly, inclusively, bravely.  Democracy is not a gift to be practiced only when permitted. We empower ourselves. Our salvation is found in each other, together.
Across America this morning and all around the world, our better angels call to us, imploring us to rise up and be as resilient as our beloved, beautiful children and grandchildren, whose future we make today.   We can do better.  I promise.
Your grandfather,
Chip Ward

Chip Ward, a TomDispatch regular, co-founded HEAL Utah and led several grassroots campaigns to make polluters accountable.  He wrote Canaries on the Rim and Hope’s Horizon, was an administrator of the award-winning Salt Lake City Public Library, and then retired to the canyons of southern Utah.  His latest work, just published, is Dance, Don't Drive: Resilient Thinking for Turbulent Times. His essays can be read at chipwardessays.blogspot.com.  He can be written at moonbolt3@hotmail.com.
Follow TomDispatch on Twitter @TomDispatch

Copyright 2012 Chip Ward 

life thoughts...

[comment] I think this may have been written by e.e.cummings... or my daughter.

from     wunderlast.pen.io 

some rules i try to live by:

1. don't panic. don't take anything, not even these words (and especially not yourself), too seriously.
2. never stop thinking.. if someone ever says to you ‘you need to stop thinking so much' just ignore them and keep thinking deeper... your mind is the most important tool you have, if you stop using it, it will atrophy. FACT.
3. daydream as much as possible, even if it's only for a few seconds at a time. stare into space blankly and don’t ever punish yourself for doing it. there's no such thing as wasting time.
4. don’t be afraid to talk about anything. ask questions, and demand answers.
5. everyone is original. every life experience is case sensitive and unique. every thing you do makes you more YOU than anyone else has ever been.
6. stop rushing. take your time and enjoy every moment.
7. don't let anyone tell you what to believe. discover 'religion' for yourself.. it should never be taught, only found.
8. talking to yourself is healthy. who else do you have more in common with?
9. we will always be in a transitional phase. look around you and know that everything will be replaced at some point.. this existence is only temporary.
10. if someone else has already said it better, don't be afraid to quote them.
11. there is no such thing as time. there is only your life- earlier today you were born and death is predicted later in the evening.
12. every now and then take something that you see everyday and try to see it in a different light. renew its existence.
13. be happy... but don’t force it. that defeats the purpose. discover what is making you unhappy, and change it.
14. you will always succeed in trying.
15. we are all crazy. every person you read about in the history books, already know, or will maybe meet on the street, has or had some kind of ‘disorder’...you just have to learn how to use yours.
16. we are all about as similar as we are different.
17. ideas are just as valuable as people. why do you think we keep making people? we hope new people will have new ideas to share- so don't let everyone down by keeping yours to yourself.
18. words will always be just words. only the feelings are real
19. ask a child for advice, and never speak down to them. they may not know much, but they know what is important.
20. prove you’re alive. remind the world you are still here.

War, Huh! What is it good for?

OK.... This is a quick thought stream, and will probably be updated as time goes by.

I saw a comment yesterday and it stuck with me.... "Are we training our kids for combat with all the video games we give them?"

I can see the future 'Wars' being fought with robots that are remote control, and our kids are sitting in some sort of virtual control booth/seat/suit and controlling their personal robot(s) that have AI on board, so one kid can control a "SGT" robot and a few drones ( pawns ) to form a squad.  

  They train in simulators, then go 'side saddle' with one of the more experienced pros, and finally they get a SGT and squad of their own.  

   Wow, this sounds like it could be a great novel/movie.

   Show kid growing up playing video games, start with the Lego type games, then go into the more advanced Worlds of .. type games, and finally they 'join up' and graduate to the big league.  

    Army and Marine assault troops, Air Force aircraft and space based vehicles.  Navy ships, subs, and carriers.  (Navy may have a political battle with the Air Force over the aircraft control. )

    Then what happens when the 'kids' start to suffer from mission creep and PTS (Post Traumatic Syndrome) . They start to see the people and things that they destroy in their dreams, and start to have neurotic problems.  [ need a better word for that] 

Mental problems? Nervous problems, Nervous breakdowns? 

   That's book 1

Book 2

   Follows the recovery and change of attitude where he's now fighting the system [underground] to destroy the current war machine.  Humm... lots of computer stuff.. lots of simulator stuff.. lots of robot on robot stuff as you break into and out of various research and operational labs.

Wow, this could get Big.

OK, more later....

TAX BREAK FOR BUDDY

Each day on my way to work, I stop off at the WAWA just outside our housing development to get some coffee.

Every day, rain or shine, hot or cold, there stands "Buddy".

I'm not sure if that's his real name, but every time I walk into the store I say, "Hi Buddy!" and I toss him a quarter. He always looked clean and well groomed, but obviously unemployed and asking for money outside the store.

About April 10th, I was on my way to work, and was about to toss him another quarter, and he said, "Ah - thank you sir, but I've found a better method. If you just write me a check for 25 cents a day for the 280 work days you come in here, you can take it off on your taxes as a charitable contribution. All I need is a check for about $70, and you don't have to remember the quarter each day, and I don't have to stand here in the rain and wind and the cold or hot weather. Best of all, you get a deduction on your upcoming taxes."

Well, I went in the store, bought my coffee and donuts, and was standing at the counter writing out the check for $70. The clerk said, "Are you writing a check for Buddy outside?"

"Yes," I said, "it's a tax break for me and makes his life a lot easier."

"Oh, No!" She said, " He doesn't have a Tax ID, and is not a charitable institution. The IRS will not allow it. You will get audited."

"Oh my! " I said , and put my checkbook away.

On my way out of the store, there stood Buddy, and I really laid into him, explaining that he was deceiving people, and had better stop the tax break routine. I ended it with this admonition to him:

"Buddy, don't put all your begs into one ask-it!" 

VERY PROUD !

Well, I have Proof Positive that my daughters are the smartest people in the world.

How? What's your proof?

Why, because they selected the best partners on the Earth!

Thanks Brian and Derek for finding them!!
You guys are THE BEST !!

World Famous Birthday

Ben Franklin

So, I was in WAWA ( like a 7-11, but local and better ) and as I was getting my coffee, a stranger said, "Where ya been? I haven't seen you in quite a while."
and I said, "Oh, I've been out for a few weeks with a twisted ankle."
and he said, "I remember you cause you remind me of Ben Franklin."
and so we continued talking and I told him some facts about Ben, bifocals, Kite and Electricity (just a legend) , his exploits with older women, and why, and how he invented an automatic door lock for his bedroom.

So, we both learned something... he about Ben Franklin, and I that I looked like him.
EEEEEKKK !!!

One of my many jobs in an exciting life.

Can you believe this? Ronald Reagan put me in charge of 10 ICBM's each with a MK12A (pronounced Mark 12 A ) with 3 RV's of a yield of 330 KT each. Usually targeted at 3 targets, but could all be dropped on a single site. 

You can see them at this site below

  MARK 12 A with Nose Cone and 3 RV's

HAPPY BIRTHDAY !!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY !!! 

To the Tune of the William Tell Overture. 

Happy, Happy, Birthday ! 
Happy, Happy, Birthday ! 
Happy, Happy, Birthday ! 
HAAAPPPYY  BIR-ERTH-DAY !! 

Happy, Happy, Happy, Happy, Happy, Happy Birthday! 
Happy, Happy, Happy, Happy, Happy, Happy Birthday! 
Happy, Happy, Birthday ! 
Happy, Happy, Birthday ! 
Happy, Happy, Birthday ! 
HAAAPPPYY  BIR-ERTH-DAY !! 

Wishing You A Very HAPPY BIRTHDAY !! 

B-29 Crashes on return from mission against Japan.

Film Found of B-29 Crash and Crew Rescue by Submarine

Thought some of you might enjoy this...The first link below is a very interesting news story worth watching...about 2.5 mins. It describes how an entire crew of a B-29 bomber (12 aviators) was rescued by a US submarine after their plane was shot down in 1945, 70 miles off the coast of Japan. The entire crash and rescue was filmed in color video but then sat in a guy's closet ... until now. This story is from a Denver TV station about one of those rescued aviators to whom the video was delivered.

The second link shows the entire video ... just over 8 mins ... crash, rescue, and the crew's transfer to another submarine that is likely headed back to port before the one that accomplished the rescue."

Can you imagine?? Receiving a video 65 yrs AFTER your rescue and you get to see it on film?!?! WOW!!!


http://bcove.me/ujl16va7
http://bcove.me/6nztpfmd

From the ROWF [ Retired Old Weather Farts ] website at http://rowf.info

CHOCOLATE ZUCCHINI CAKE

Chocolate Zucchini Cake

INGREDIENTS:
 3 cups all-purpose flour
1& 1/4  teaspoon baking powder
1 & 1/4 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon salt
1/4  teaspoon cinnamon
3 squares of unsweetened chocolate squares.
 4 eggs
3 cups granulated sugar
1 & 1/2 cup vegetable oil
1 & 1/2 teaspoons vanilla
1/2 teaspoon of almond extract
1/2 pound raw zucchini, shredded  ( About 2 Cups )
  1 cup coarsely chopped pecans
1/2 cup chopped dates

Optional: Confectioners' sugar to sprinkle on top when it's done.

PREPARATION:

Generously grease and flour a 10-inch Angel Food cake pan.
Preheat oven to 350°.

Sift flour with baking powder, baking soda, salt, cinnamon,  set aside.

In a large mixing bowl with hand held electric mixer at high speed, beat eggs until light in color and fluffy.

Gradually beat in granulated sugar until light and fluffy;
Beat in oil. with mixer at low speed,
beat in the sifted dry ingredients in thirds.

Drain shredded zucchini
Fold zuchinni into the flour mixture along with vanilla and nuts and dates.
Spoon into prepared tube (angel food)  pan and bake at 350 for 1 hour and 15 minutes,
or until a wooden pick or cake tester inserted in center comes out clean.

Cool in pan on rack for 20 minutes, then remove from pan to cool completely.
Sift confectioners' sugar over cake before serving, or chocolate frosting.

- Mrs Paul Leanas. Franklin Park, Chicago Il area.

"NOW" they tell me..

Seems that now some physicists are thinking that "TIME" is just a dimension like Up, Left, Back... and some others think it's just an illusion, and we're actually existing in all 'times' past, present, and future.

So I guess I'll just go to the March 3rd in 1954, and warn myself to pay attention when playing hockey.


See You There....

On 2012

Dear World,

Please stop freaking out about 2012. 
Our calendars ended there because some Spanish dirt-bags invaded our country and we got a little busy ok?

Sincerely,
The Mayans

History Time

Wow, I guess we're seeing history all around us.
Greece... and a possible (possible) vote on the austerity cuts.
Oakland... and the strike tomorrow, longshoremen, and the entire Occupy movement.
If Oakland is somewhat successful, will it spread to other sites?
Oh, and the stock market is going down the tubes.

The NPR Penguin Joke

First a short one.
Here goes:
A penguin goes into a bar and walk up to the bartender and says "I can't find my dad. Have you seen him?"
And the bartender says "I don't know. What does he look like?"

and now the Shaggy Dog One.
====
I heard this on the Prairie Home Companion on NPR on Saturday, June 24th, 2006. When they were broadcasting in Salt Lake City, Utah.  We were driving home from seeing the kids and it didn't finish when we got home, but it was so great that I sat in the driveway for about 3 more minutes to listen till the end.

Once upon a time, (actually everything that happens, happens at some upon a time or another)… but I digress…  anyway...

Once upon a time there was this standup comic named Frank, and he was really good.  He was doing a standup gig in San Francisco at a comedy club, as he was on a tour with a group of comics out of New York.  He was especially good at telling penguin jokes.

One of his jokes goes like this,
Two penguins that are sitting on an iceberg.
One penguin looks over and says, “It looks like you’re wearing a tuxedo.”
And the other penguin looks over and says, “How do you know I’m not?”

It just happened that there was a cruise director in the audience and the cruise director thought Frank was pretty funny.  They were about to take a medium sized cruise ship, with a group of rich Californians off to the Samoa Islands.  Afterwards he talks to Frank back stage,

"Frank, I'll give you $300 a day, and free room and board on the ship, all the way out to America Samoa AND back, if you'll be the warm-up act."

  Well, of course Frank said “Yes!”,  and got a job on a cruise line as one of the warm up acts for the show.

So, off sails the ship and that night Frank got up on stage and he starts out his act with this joke:
“Why are we all going to America Samoa?”
And the audience goes, “I don’t know, why?”
And Frank says, “So you can all spend Samoa Money!”

Well, that joke didn’t go over so well, so then he told his favorite Penguin joke.  That one hit the spot and everyone starts laughing, especially one rather large man in the front row, and he started out laughing, and laughing, and then laughing so hard he started to cry!  Then he collapsed onto the floor and went into cardiac arrest!

Well, the crew responded quickly, and stabilized him, but they had to request a helicopter ambulance from the Coast Guard, to take the man off the ship for further medical care.  They flew him over to a nearby island and then put him on a medical evac plane and flew him to the nearest hospital.

Well, the ship’s Owner, the Captain and the Cruise Director were all very upset and they explained to Frank that they liked him, but just couldn't afford all the helicopters and emergency medical expenses, so they had to let him go. Frank was just Too Damn Funny! They bought out his contract and dropped him off at their next port of call en route to America Samoa.

So Frank was stuck on this little rinky-dinky island for 3 days till he could catch a tramp steamer on its way to San Francisco.  He has his $300 a day for 14 days, plus his passport in his money belt, so he's feeling pretty good. To while away his time, he went for a walk around the small island, and was talking to himself and practicing his jokes.

Eventually Frank came upon a flock of sheep and stood by the fence looking at them and decided to work on his favorite penguin joke.  Unbeknownst to him, one of the locals was playing with his new video camera and was recording this weird guy talking to the sheep.

So Frank told his penguin joke to the sheep, and then they started going crazy…. Baaa BAA BAAA , BAA BAA BAA… and it was like they were laughing at the joke.  Then the sheep ran over to the edge of their pen and started going Baa, Baa to the pig, and the pig went nuts with GRUNT, GRUNNT, GRRUUUNT like it was laughing, and then the pig went over to the Horse and started grunting and grunting and the Horse went WHINNIE, WHIIINNIE, WHIINIE like it was laughing.  The whole time the kid on the island with the new video camera was busy recording the entire event.

Then the horse went across his pasture and over to the cows and started telling the joke to the cows, and the cows went MOO, MOOOO, MOOOOO, and they all laughed so hard that milk came out of their noses!!!

Well, all this ended up on the recording, but Frank didn’t notice. He went back to port to wait for the ship.

So about 2 days later the tramp steamer came into port and Frank got on to get back to San Francisco.  About a day later out in the middle of the Pacific Ocean a huge storm came up and tossed the ship every which way and the ship broke in half and Frank found himself as the only survivor swimming in the middle of the Pacific Ocean.

Then it got worse. Worse? How could it get Worse?

Well, he got swallowed by a whale, and spent 3 weeks in the mouth of this LARGE whale and finally the whale clears his throat and Frank was spat up on an unknown shore.

He had no idea where he was, but he saw some people off in the distance and started running and waving his arms in the air as he ran towards them.

They in turn started shooting at him.  He raised his arms and they surrounded him.  It turns out he was on the shore of Iraq in the Persian Gulf and was captured by some local militia.  As they’re capturing him, one of them says, “Hey! Wait ! You’re the guy in the video  from Larry on YouTube, the one with the cow with the milk coming out of her nose!”

Well, Frank goes, “Huh?” and they tell him about this video that is all over the internet with this guy Larry, and it shows Frank telling the penguin joke to some sheep, and the sheep tell it to the pigs and … (well, you know the story).

So they take Frank to the border with Kuwait, and he gets across the border  passport and picks up a ride down to Kuwait City. Luckily, because he just happened to have his money belt on him when he got paid by the cruise line, he's all set.  Being an actor/stand up comic, he didn’t have a bank account, of course.  So he got a flight to London, and from there to New York City.

As he arrives at customs in JFK, the Customs Agents are looking at him, and there is something familiar about him.  So they start checking their Official TSA Terrorist Photo Book, because they know they’ve seen him before, and then it hits them…. He’s the guy in the Video with the Sheep and the Cow and the milk coming out of her nose.

 Well, they welcome him back to the States and allow him to pass through. Now he's back in NYC!

So Frank gets to his apartment in San Francisco, and he has dozens of letters and messages on his phone answering machine to call these various book publishers and TV shows.  They all want him to do a Penguin Book for them.  You know, pictures of penguins with little balloons with stupid sayings above their heads.  But, and it's a big Butt, he has to have it finished in 5 days, so they can print it up and get it on the newsstands before the novelty of the penguins fades away.

So Frank makes a deal with Penguin Books to do TWO books.  One for them, and another so he can tell the story of his adventure from the shipwreck, etc.  But the catch is that he has to have the sayings for the penguins done by Tuesday so they can print 40 million copies and get them to the bookstores while it’s still fresh in everyone’s mind.

Oh, gosh, … only 4 more days to come up with 100 stupid sayings… Well, Frank comes up with 50 rather fast, but he just can’t think of 50 more, so he goes off to take a break and decides to take a walk around town.  As he’s going along, he comes to the Zoo and decides to spend a few hours in the Zoo getting ideas for the book.

While at the Zoo he comes upon the penguin display and asks the caretaker if he can just go inside, sit in the side where no one will see him, and just sit and watch the penguins and try to think up some stupid sayings for the book.

Well, the caretaker recognizes him and says, “Hey, you're the guy with the penguin joke and the cow with milk coming out of her nose.  Well, sure, just knock on the door when you want out. Here's the parka we wear when we go in there.”

So he lets Frank in, gives him his parka, and Frank sits back on a rock out of sight of the visitors and watches the penguins.  He's getting some great ideas, and is writing them all down.

Well, soon a penguin waddles on over and starts going “ Honk, Hooonk !!!” and putting his flipper up by his nose.

“What?” , says Frank.

“Honk, Honk!” goes the penguin, and all the time tapping its flipper to his nose.

“Oh, my gosh,” says, Frank, “have you seen the video too?”

“Honk, Honk!” says the penguin, and he turns his head sideways and sort-of smiles.

The penguin starts honking like crazy and pokes his flipper in Frank’s hand like he’s trying to write something.  Then he goes “Honk, Honk”, and Frank finely figures out that he’s trying to tell a Knock, Knock joke.

“Honk, Honk!” goes the penguin.
“Who’s There?”, says Frank.
And the penguin grunts this word, “Fornication”
Frank smiles and says… “Fornication who?”
And the penguin says,” Fornication like this, you should also be wearing a tuxedo.”